So Very Hard

Marcus is bad today, really bad. He is so stiff he can hardly walk and he has fell down twice that I have seen. I say it that way cause he hides a lot from me. He doesn't want to appear 'weak' as he put it. He also doesn't want to take his medicine so every dose has been a struggle so far, well until today. Today he is actually asking for it.
This is the hardest thing, as a mother, that I have ever been through. I thought him being sick so much when he was younger was rough but this tops it. At least back then you could see the light at the end of the tunnel. You knew that sooner or later that he would be getting better.
Now every day he is just worse it seems with the exception of a good day or two now and then. It is so hard watching an energetic, athletic 10 year old walk like an old man from the stiffness and pain and not being able to do a damn thing about it!